Below
are some tips to keep your relationship off the rocks, and solid ground.
Wish Bowl: if
your partner doesn’t initate with you romantically and intimately you can
encourage him or her by writing down thing you like on cards and putting them
in a bowl. For example: give a massage, plan a date, have a shower together,
create a romantic mood, offer a hug and a kiss when you see each other after
work, write poetry, etc. get your partner to tahe one card out of the bowl each
evening and learn to become intimate. Since they’re your ideas you are more
likely to respond in a positive fashion.
Eyes Wide Open: To
help connect on an emotional level with your partner take a minute each day to
look into your partner’s eyes and express how you feel about him or her, follow
it up with a kiss…with your eyes open…
Gifts from the Heart: Every
now and then surprise your partner with a gift. It doesn’t have to be anything
big but make sure when you give it, you tell your partner how much you love and
appreciate the things he or she does for you. It will create a sense of
gratitude and your partner will not feel taken for granted.
Getting Rid of Anger: To
release anger in a way that doesn’t escalate an argument, find a target that
you can pretend is the person you are angry with and throw bean bags at it.
Verbalize what that person does to make you angry. On each throw you release
your resentment and frustration both verbally and physically. This way you
don’t take it out on your partner. And, by letting off steam you have a chance
to siscuss your feelings clearly and honestly.
Time to Relax: For
couples with kids it’s important that you share raising them fairly. Take turns
preparing meals, running them around and picking up after them. This allows the
other partners to have some down time. Make a schedule that blocks time for
both the daily chores and free time. Taking time to relax will help you be more
up for positive interaction with your kids, each other.
Silent Connection:
Spend a minute each day facing each other and pressing your hands up against
your partner’s. look into each other’s eyes. Then tell him or her something you
like about about him or her. Nonverbal initimacy, even for a short time, can short-circuit
the day’s frustration and put you in a positive mental state. The verbal
reinforcement helps insure you are connecting on all levels.
Active listing: this
exercise can help you and your partner understand and learn what the other is
feeling so that you have a chance lo start solving issues in your relationship.
Find a quiet private place in your home. Take turns telling each other what you
want to say. When one of you has spoken the other partner must repeat back what
was said, NOT what they think they heard. Repeat your partner’s sentiments
until you get it right. This will save misunderstanding, confusion and lots of
yelling!
Intimacy Tips
Treat each other like royalty: Take
turns bringing each other a meal in bed. It’s initimate, and makes your partner
feel special and cared for.
Partnership? Team Building: To
strengthen your partnership try doing things together that need both your
input. Going camping, for instance, can be fun, but you have to help each other
pitch the tent and encourage each other’s efforts. A change of environment and
teamwork can work wonders for the sexlife.
Creative Foreplay: Bringing
creativity into your sex life is fun and keeps desire alive. Edible body paints
and foods are a great way to bring sensuality into foreplay. Stimulating the
senses can create desire and passion.
Couples ARC: When
you and your partner have resorted to insulting each other it causes a lot of
hurt. Both partners in a relationship need to take responsibility for being
mean and hurtful. Each day turn to each other and APOLOGIZE for a wrong doing
mention something you RESPECT in your partner and CONNECT by hugging or
kissing. These three things, done daily, can really ground the relationship.
Romance Chest: Many
couples lack romance in their busy lives and many women’s evoked through
romantic gestures. A simple way to bring intimacy to the relationship is to put
together a romance chest – include wine, candles, scented oils for message.
Chocolate, etc. when you’re in the mood you can goto the box and set the scene
for a romantic evening.
Poetry and Romance: A simple way to show someone
you care about them is writing a poem. It may seem old-fashioned but if it’s
romantic and heartfelt it can create emotional desire.
Sensual Massage: Massage
helps couples wind down and learn to touch each other gently and sensually. It
usually creates desire and a sense of well being and a closeness with you
partner.
Partnership Dance: To
help reconnect, find an activity that you can both learn to do together. Look
for something that you both find interesting. It will keep you connected and
focused on accomplishing something NEW together.
Letting Go of the Past: Old
issues can destroy your chances of moving into future. Couples can write down
their past issues and transgressions on small cards then attach them to
balloons. Facing each other, take turns reading the cards. Each partner needs
to look the other in the eye, acknowledge the issue, make a heartfelt apology
and then let the issue go forever. Watching the balloon float way the process of
closure.
Weekly Schedules: Schedules
can help couples work out their time together and have a more balanced
relationship. By using magnets on the refrigerator to symbolize your plans set
aside specific times of specific days for together time. Get into a routine so
that you can schedule both alone time and together time.
